Love is Love: The First Act 🏳️‍🌈

The First Act: Here We Go!

 

“What? What does that mean?”, I’ve never heard that before.

“Which means… Ummm… I…. Google, no”, she felt hard to tell it.

“So, you are telling me you are Business Intelligent?”, I asked her after searching ‘bi’ on the Internet. I thought it was some degree she was going to do along with her course. I didn’t see the bomb in front of it. Little did I know she was special from others, but yeah. She confirmed it that day.

“I’m Bisexual, Deepan. It means I can like both men and women”, she told it and let off a big sigh. She seemed relieved.

“Isn’t that trans? Are you a third gender?”, I blurted out. She didn’t like me asking that.

“You’ve gone to Australia, right?”, she asked me patiently. I thought about the Louis Phillippe advertisement I did there. I nodded my head.

“Remember you told you saw two girls kissing in your set? You even mentioned it was hot”, she was telling out everything. I looked around. Even though there wasn’t anyone in the restaurant, her words made me look around if someone had noticed. We were in Copper Kitchen, Porur.

“Okay, yeah, I told. Later I learned they were called lesbians. Wait are you one of them?”, I asked her, laughing. She was fuming with anger.

“Fuck you! Am I some animal or what? The way you say am that or this? I thought you’ll have some common sense to understand how sexuality works. With the disgust on your face, you are just like the rest of them. You are no help”, she told and got up to leave. I persuaded her to stay back.

Honestly, I had no idea what she was talking about. I never knew any of these, before. Yes, I got to know about the existence of Gay and Lesbian relationships only after what I saw as normalcy in Melbourne. If that is what she’s going through right now, I wanted to help her. I could sense she was in a lot of trouble. Her eyes had black patches around, while her cheekbones protruded out of her flat cheeks. Her lips were peeling off, dry. I never wanted to see her like this.

I held her hands. I got emotional before I started speaking. I knew I can’t tell her what I wanted to tell her, all these days. I touched the small box in my pocket. I was heavily disappointed, but I knew I had to do something. I swallowed. Tears started rolling out. She softened after seeing the state I was in.

“See, I’ve always wanted the best for you. I’ve always you to be happy. You be anything you want, whatever you are. You’re Pallavi for me, the same old Pallavi I’ve always loved. You know am always here to help you out. I don’t know what you’re going through right now. But if I could help you somehow, tell me. I trust you”, I was holding back my tears.

“I’ve lived with this myself for three years. I didn’t know if it was right or wrong. Do you remember the time Meera and I were thick friends? That was roughly when I began to discover myself. I had this strange feeling in my stomach when I saw her dressing, along with me in the room, for the annual day. I told her about this, but she didn’t know why I felt like that. She felt I was weird, and she was never the same with me again. I spent a year trying to convince myself am just like others but then, I couldn’t do that anymore. I thought of telling it to my family but there happened something, something that told me I have zero chance of a peaceful life, hereafter”, she gave a pause. She took a deep breath. I held her hands. She clenched them hard.

Hands Clasped by Seatolean

“Last year, my dad exposed a girl, as he saw her being close with another girl in the car parking. He was with us in the mall, until he realized he forgot his keys and went back to the car. There, he caught the couple a few cars away, took photos of their intimate moments, and posted them on Facebook. He shared it on WhatsApp with everyone he knew. He shared it in our family WhatsApp group, with the caption, ‘See where our nation is going, the next generation needs to be protected! #ConservativeandProud #SaveIndia’. While the whole family was busy talking ill about the two girls, I knew I was so screwed up. I knew he’ll kill me if at all I come out of the closet, " she said. I interrupted her.

“Coming out of the closet?”, I looked at her with a confused reaction.

“It’s letting people know about something you’ve kept a secret before, in my case, my sexual preference”, she explained. She continued talking.

“My dad prioritizes his dignity over me. I want to live with Nikitha. He’ll definitely not accept us. We both feel we can have a life where we both could stay happy. So, I’m running away with her today”, she said firmly. I was beyond confused, I mean, was she in a relationship the whole time? I thought she was just her colleague in the Accenture, she worked for. When did all this happen?

“You were in a relationship Nikitha and you never told me? And you think running away would solve everything? Seriously?”, I asked her. This was not her, not the Pallavi I knew. Not the bold one she was before. It just kept getting worse.

Cafe by Natoly Art

“See, me being a rebel everywhere is different. Here, it involves another person too. I don’t want to fight with my family over this and risk her life too. And I didn’t tell you before, because, you were not ready for it.  Understand, Deepan”, she made herself clear. Yeah, I was not ready then also. What am I even supposed to say! I asked the next in my mind.

“What about your mother? What’s your plan?”, I knew the next 48 hours is going to be crucial. I was frustrated, irritated, shocked, and disappointed in the last hour, but I knew I’m playing something important in her plan. I still couldn’t accept her, but yeah, she’s what she is. I had to at least pretend that am fine.

“I hope my mother will forgive me when she understands. I hope she does. Plan, yeah, We’re going to need your car. Here’s my card, fill in diesel and go to the location I’m going to send you. Once you pick Nikitha from there, come back with her, here. I’ll tell the rest later”, she told. I replayed everything in my mind, and I was already shaking. Damn, she got to be kidding me.

She hugged me, patted my back, and left the restaurant. I kept looking at the door even after she left. I didn’t know it was going to be like this when I came in through that door. I felt that small little box in my pocket, heavier than before. My mobile pinged from another pocket. I got a message from an unknown number.

UNKNOWN NUMBER: Hi Deepan!

UNKNOWN NUMBER: 📍Location, Triplicane

UNKNOWN NUMBER: See you Soon, Deepan.

UNKNOWN NUMBER: - Nikitha

I really wanted to break my phone, but I was not in a financial condition to break an iPhone. Pallavi texted me.

PALLAVI: Be here back by 2:00 am.

PALLAVI: Park your car stealth and wait for my call.

PALLAVI: Don’t sight-adichfy my girl. I’ll kill you.

PALLAVI: Love ya! ❤️😉

The world knows what am up to, right now. I came out of the restaurant and got into my car. I shifted to the first gear and sped into the Arcot Road. My phone pinged again. It was 12. I had a notification from Twitter. “Happy Pride Month! This June, Let’s celebrate LGBTQ+ community!🏳️‍🌈”, it read. Ah, yeah.

“Here we go!”, I told, on my way to celebrate Pride month.

 

 

Let’s continue in The Next Act, next week. Stay Tuned! 🏳️‍🌈